March 2008
Judging on a Curve
We endure some harsh criticism during our uncharted journey through life. Who wrote the book of standards on how to live your life? If you live by the Bible, then what version are you trusting to be the truth? Is your bible condemning the rest of the world to your version of Hell? Are my sins forgivable; how many times can I hurt a friend and still go to your version of Heaven?
How Sir, may I please you? Was my attire not right for the occasion? Did I not follow proper etiquette at the dinner table? How can I be friends with Fred without pissing Bill off, because Fred and Bill do not like each other? Whose ass should I kiss first?
The news hounds are in control of the world and destroying relationships, families and lives at an unstoppable rate. Irony is the new national anthem and the laws of the land are double standard. What is ok for one person is totally unacceptable for another. Mass destruction of lives is a new video game.
Record amounts of Lithium is being disbursed to keep us from showing human emotions and to dull our appetite for life, because we are too loud for the self-righteous.
The tabloids are constantly probing Britney Spears, but has she really been that bad? I am not the "leave Britney alone" crusader, but I am asking that we judge ourselves on the same scale that we base our expectations of others on. Problem solved. Now, let's move on to a war being fought that the world seems to have forgotten and that has been going on for way too long.
With this being an election year and the end an eight year-long saga of mistrust and turmoil of a nation for it's elected government, there seems to be a domino effect of betrayal and chaos. It can also be noted that since the time of ancient Rome and the soothsayer's warning to Julius Caesar, "Beware the Ides of March", foretelling of his betrayal and murder, superstition suggests that is a time for no man to turn his back to friends.
Being a gay man in an isolated and somewhat backward area of West Virginia is not ever easy. It can be rough on even those of us with the thickest of skins. We are a minority and our only hope for equality is to ban together as a single force, but this is not reality. We are separated further within the LGBT community by various other petty factors. Jealousy, envy and lack of trust, cause us to attack each other. I don't think this lack of trust is more obvious in any other sector of the population. Those who do think of equality issues are ridiculed by those who live in darkness and prefer that their secrets remain there.
Gossip is a vicious and hateful weapon. Words do hurt. There is no friendship or relationship of any kind without trust, compassion and forgiveness. In this time of betrayal and chaos within out community I am reminded of the lyrics to Bob Dylan's 1960's hit song "Blowin in the Wind".
How many roads must a man walk down
Before you call him a man?
Yes, 'n' how many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand?
Yes, 'n' how many times must the cannon balls fly
Before they're forever banned?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind,
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
How many times must a man look up
Before he can see the sky?
Yes, 'n' how many ears must one man have
Before he can hear people cry?
Yes, 'n' how many deaths will it take till he knows
That too many people have died?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind,
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
How many years can a mountain exist
Before it's washed to the sea?
Yes, 'n' how many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free?
Yes, 'n' how many times can a man turn his head,
Pretending he just doesn't see?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind,
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
lyrics by Bob Dylan
"Forgiveness, compassion and brotherly love will one day bind us as a real community. At that point, Pride will have a new meaning and our quest for equality will be victorious!"
by Jim Lawson
Under the Same Sky
There are times in life when we must face the unknown alone. We must face it alone in mind, body and spirit. There are times when a list of familiar names and those you called 'friend' now appears to be a list of co-conspirators in a plot to sabotage your efforts, dim your light and bring you to your knees for their thoughtless amusement. These times when the closest family member is metaphorically light years away, because you have put your foot down and adamantly decided to take a stand, change your heart forever.
Why do these things happen? Why do friends betray friends? In searching for the answer to these questions, first and most importantly, we must consider the fact that we may have been wearing blinders and that these people were and never will act as real friends should. We have settled for companionship and overlooked some major issues and differences. When tucked out of sight, these issues almost always resurface in time.
Often, when we feel alone, we are receiving inner guidance from our higher consciousness. We are telling ourselves we deserve better than what we are receiving. There is a divine universal wisdom. This wisdom lifts us to a higher conscious when our frustrations with society overwhelm us.
Sometimes we have to be our own best friend. When we feel frightened, we must act with courage, think from the heart of experience and not be led by fear. When we focus our attention we can make our dreams a reality. Not everyone will see our vision at first, but if we believe strongly in it and our abilities, the dream will manifest.
I was recently very disappointed in the lack of support from people I felt closest to me in regards to a project I have started. However, as time passed my disappointment changed to acceptance and then to a sense of success. I stood tall while under scrutiny and I prevailed. I realized it was my own self that had carried me to this point and even without the help of others, I had all the tools I needed to complete the job alone.
Human compassion is a very rare trait, but a necessary ingredient for the survival of the human race. Reality TV can be a perfect example of how little of it exists. When push comes to shove and a prize is at stake, true colors surface, no stone is unturned and no lie too big to tell. Where does integrity fit into the formula for success? With all of Donald Trump's money, does he still not appear to be just a big loser? I am not sure I could stand to sit in a room with that man for long and endure his aggressive, juvenile behavior. Is this the image of success that you have? Mine is quite different.
As we struggle as individuals to be treated with equality as we pursue our individual vision of happiness, let's not forget to show compassion to the man who's dream is a little different than our own. We share the same divine wisdom. We all bleed when we are cut. We all must share the same sun, the same moon and the same earth.
by Jim Lawson
bravenet.com